The mechanics of how the human mind operates is one in which no individual can fully fathom. It is safe to say that each mind works alike, yet so differently. Why does one do what they do? Is there a a simple thought process put into every action or is it just a subconscious reaction to any occurring manner. How does ones personality develop? Are we all born with a pre-destined set of thinking or is it something that we can change on command? From a personal standpoint, it is both. I've been observing the relation between an individuals charisma and their lifestyle for quite a bit of time. I'm not saying I'm some sort of psychologist, but this topic has fascinated me for a while now just because it's not necessarily one in which people speak of on a frequent basis.
Analyzing myself first, I flashed back to when I was about two years old, and yes, believe it or not, I remember almost every incident that has occurred in my life since about that age, something very few people can apparently do. At two years of age, my parents had divorced, leaving me trapt in between the constant chaos my parents frequently built up. Right before finalizing the divorce, my parents had one last fight that was undoubtedly the worst one, and I unfortunately remember it as if it were yesterday. The basic gist of it is hand were risen, blow dryers had been thrown, and doors had been broken. Leaving Texas because of a failed marriage, my mother and I had moved to Torrance, California, leaving my father. The case was not that one parent would be out of my life from that point on, it was simply that the marriage did not work out at all which later caused me to fly out to Texas every other week to visit my father by myself, at only two years old. This went on for years, eventually causing my dad to move to California to be closer to his son. Of course, being closer to my father had its consequences. With the fighting back on its feet between my parents, it felt as if my life would be nothing but a giant argument. Now as a child, vulnerability was something I had been very susceptible to as is the case with every kid. With the mind growing, it sinks in the world around it, shaping ones character as well as basic skills; people skills, thinking skills, and the ability to comprehend the world around. A simple example is when I had enrolled into a catholic pre-school, I have no idea why my parents put me there, after not even two weeks, I had been expelled. Why? Because I had gone around stating that my father would kill your father and that he was better than any other father around. Now why would a five year old say such a thing? It brings me back to my previous statement that we all, as children, absorb the world around us.
From that point on, I had seen both my parents on a somewhat regular basis, but it had started to become very inconvenient simply because my dad lived two hours away in San Diego. So for now, lets just say I had lived with one parent. My mothers way of looking at life had differed significantly from my own, causing us to have frequent disagreements. Eventually, I just stopped trying to go to my mom to talk just because I was thinking it would lead to nothing but another argument. Don't get me wrong, I love her with all of my heart and she is a wonderful mother, all I am saying is our personalities are very different. So growing up from that point on, my communication skills began to deteriorate because I avoided every chance I had to have regular communication with my mom. I used to be a quite boy, leaving the excitement out just because I wouldn't know how to interact with other kids. It was safe to say that my personality had been characterless. What had shaped it after that point was the people I had been around. My elementary school had been full of wild goonies who always were loud and doing something. I began to convert to that sort of lifestyle from beginning to communicate with those who had been so out and about. Point being is that if it weren't for those goons, I might currently have been some lame, boring, kid who is just another walking body on this planet.
The point of all of this is not to give you some sort of life story, its to show how unique each persons persona really is and that there is a whole life story behind it. I've noticed that those who have excellent communication skills, "popular", or can get along with just about anyone, are those who have a close bond with family, constantly interacting with those who have always been in their lives and have shaped who they are from an early age. There's a reason some people are douches, some are criminals, and some live a fail of a life. It brings great question as to why we think the way we do, or why we process the world around us the way we have been doing. However, there are two outlooks on this topic. As much as some might feel that their ways of thinking are final and unchangeable, there is always a way to change, it just depends on ones outlook on life. Many do not realize how powerful your mentality as well as your desire to be whatever you wish to be really is. Believe it or not, you can easily shape how your mind comprehends the world around you simply if you put in the effort to understand where you came from or how you became who you are today.
With that being said, commit to memory that the next time you're presented with one of those people you just want to punch in the face, take the time to realize that it is not necessarily the fact that they are unpleasant on command, it is just the set of events as well as life story behind that personality that has turned that individual into who they are today. Never expect anything out of anyone simply based on your judgements of that certain individual because youll be amazed how some people can surprise you ;) Walk in someone else's shoes, understand that person, really get to know as many people as you can while still appreciating the beauty and divinity of yourself.
